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Pastor RU Reedy at the New-Year Episcopal
Preach Off Competition 2008 -- 2nd place
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Brothers and Sisters! What is up? It has been way too long since you and I have shared a moment together in the presence of Jehovah. Can you feel it up in the house? Come on somebody!
As a side note, the other day someone told me that the word Jehovah is not in the Bible. I told them, what do you mean its not in the Bible, I'm a preacher and I've been using the word for over 10 years. You can't touch the anointing baby! Last time I checked, the word "trinity" is not in the Bible, and that isn't stopping any religious folks from using it. Well, if the word "trinity" ain't in the Bible, then who cares if Jehovah is just a really bad transliteration of Yahweh from the Hebrew? It isn't like I'm some kind of Bible scholar. I'm a preacher!
So let me get my preach on! I heard the other day that Brent wrote a post about how he would write for some kind of multi-religious blog called Pathos. At first, I was kind of weirded out. I mean this Pathos place sounds like the mark of the beast. But then I thought about it some more. I really don't know anything about Pathos, but I say if Brent can make some dough...then go baby, go! But then I saw this picture and thought to myself:
"Why isn't Engage Outreach International buying some real-estate on that website"? It's time to bring the glory down! Just imagine. Someone happens upon Brent's blog reading about how to become Catholic and all, and down at the bottom a banner says;
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| Don't worry you will always have the poor with you! |
When they click on the link, it will take them to our newest ministry for those looking to make an investment to build up the kingdom. Don't worry. I'm not talking about the poor -- you will always have them around. That's right, I'm talking about gold! Last time I checked, Jesus said he did not come to abolish the Old Testament but to perfect it. Well, I was thumbing through a few pages somewhere between Exodus and Psalms, and I found a whole bunch of gold up in there.
Money. Cometh. To. Me. Now!
I wonder if Pathos would take the ad? They let all those people pretending they don't want 10 wives on there. You know what I say, the anointing will open up doors God can't even close. Nothing is impossible. If Brent goes to Pathos, I will definitely be selling ads on his blog. Just think of all the souls that will be saved and
I should probably wrap up this blog sermonette, because I know I've given you a lot to think about. I wouldn't want to load you up with the meat of the Word since you are only just babes trying to come off the liquored-up milk of Romanism. Anyways, most preachers like to quote Scripture. I like to reference Scripture. If you noticed, I talked about Exodus and Psalms. That is two books of the Bible, which makes me a pretty advanced preacher. So before you finish this post, think about that.
Exodus and Psalms! What did you think I was talking about? There are 190 chapters to meditate on between the two. And after you get done, dial 1-800-NIV-GOLD*. Our prayer attendants are standing by.
*1-800-NIV-GOLD is not a real number. If you call that number, I am not responsible for what happens. This was satire. If you dial the number thinking you will reach someone, you have failed to appreciate the satire. In fact, you have failed. Miserably.
